Write.

Whenever the conversation of baggage comes up, it’s often seen as a feminine attribute. But real talk, the baggage that we walk around with gents is very real and it’s not something that women will ever fully be able to understand. Now don’t get me wrong, this is not a competition, what we’re carrying is not worse than what women carry, it’s just different. Over the years women have been socialized to spend time amongst themselves talking their baggage out. However, for us men talking our baggage out was ‘out’ of the question. Still today it’s seen as a sign of weakness. I mean any emotional display outside of anger, or laughter, and you’re the softest guy on the block. We couldn’t be more wrong fellas, we’ve got to get our baggage dealt with.

Aaron Bernard speaking at the Gentlemen’s Brunch in August 2019.

At our Gentlemen’s Brunch in August 2019 my boy Aaron Bernard, one of the dopest Life Coaches in the game, dropped a great tip to help us get started. He shared with us the importance of writing things out. Journaling is a great way to acknowledge your emotions and get them out of your head. It’s a nice and private way to begin facing your baggage head on. What should you write? Well, I’ve found it best to start with a three step approach to writing things out:

• Write out the experience.

• Write how the experience made you feel.

• Write what you learned from the experience.

Although putting these thoughts to paper is only a first step to dealing with your baggage, it will provide you with some clarity on the things you carry that weigh on you. Trust me, the fact that you can stumble around carrying your baggage is not a display of grit, strength or alpha masculinity—it’s a sign of weakness.

I know it’ll take time to build up to sharing the baggage you’re carrying with someone verbally—its not the easiest thing to do out the gate. So get your hands on a journal and start writing.

#CarryEverything